New life chapter.
Bear with me a few minutes....
I lost my sister. February 23, 2015.
This is a pain like I didn't know existed. I am better now.
But, I've screamed at the top of my lungs. I've cried 10 times my weight in tears (now that's a lot). I've beat myself up with regrets. I've knocked myself down with guilt.
I've moaned and groaned, and whined and why'd.
But I've also laughed, and laughed, and laughed. And smiled the biggest smiles with the joy and memories of having had the privilege of all that comes with loving and being loved by Melinda.
I'm not out of sap, by any means. But there's only so much I can share out loud without beginning to hear the eye rolls of those that must listen. Not because you don't love me, but because LIFE GOES ON.
I don't expect to be without hard days. Heaven knows, Daddy and Momma, and her kids will have so many more than I. But I'm not going to plan for them. I'm not going to worry about them. I'm going to smile and go on and love so much better for the pain I've felt the last week.
I love Ed Sherran. That cute little red-headed Englishman, that has a voice and a way with words that touches me to the core sometimes. (I'm not terribly deep, ya know). And in the quiet this morning when the rest of the house was sleeping, his little hidden track came on and I felt it appropriate.
It I know it sounds like an Irish drinking song. So before you think me odder than you already do, (Freak Flag alert!!!)I need to say that in this sweet tune I hear a goodbye from someone that knows he's leaving behind regrets that will never be able to be rectified at his leaving. He knows he can't stop it, and he can't prevent the pain. He can only wish joy to those that love him and go on with what must be.
So I'll share this, and promise (a promise that I will try to keep) no more sappiness in my little blog world. At least for a while.
The Parting Glass
I've spent it in good company
And all the harm that e'er I've done
Alas it was to none but me
And all I've done for want of wit
To memory now I can't recall
So fill to me the parting glass
Good night and joy be with you all
Of all the comrades that e'er I had
They are sorry for my going away
And all the sweethearts that e'er I had
They would wish me one more day to stay
But since it falls unto my lot
That I should rise and you should not
I'll gently rise and I'll softly call
Good night and joy be with you all
A man may drink and not be drunk
A man may fight and not be slain
A man may court a pretty girl
And perhaps be welcomed back again
But since it has so ought to be
By a time to rise and a time to fall
Come fill to me the parting glass
Good night and joy be with you all
Good night and joy be with you all
*******
So....Now what...how do I talk about no progress on a glamper after that?
Well, first I'll say. there's no progress on the Hag Wagon. I did finish a new little "art to me" piece to hang up in it. Problem is...I like it in my "happy room" so there it shall stay.
Now you are wondering what in the dickens is my "happy room"? It's my craft room. I have a sewing room, too. But my craft room is where I hang/keep all the silly things I have made, bought or been given that make me happy to look at, but have no where they really "go". I spent a lot of years not buying things, or making things that I liked, because I didn't have anywhere to put them. Well, now, if the shoe fits, and it fits no where else, it goes in my craft room.
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| I've done both...but I don't keep Dicky in the Happy Room. He can't be left unattended. :) |
Now my craft/happy room is not to be confused with my sewing room. I have such an ADD mind, that I have to have two rooms so I can keep my crafts going all at the same time. I just run back and forth as the need arises.
Remeber the flowers I had on FB Online Garage sale a couple of weeks ago...well...for whatever reason I found myself in the middle of the floor of my happy room this morning, and voila! The urge hit, and the flowers just happened to be right at my fingertips. So BOOM...I do still have some left, though. so if you are in need, please feel free to call.
******
I have a true sadness for those that are only able to be sad in a time of loss. (Ok...a little sappy...but this won't hurt much, I promise.)The tears are going to fall, but God's true love allows for smiles in the worst of times.
And by golly...there has been some laughing going on this weekend.
Torie's boys are so adorable, I could absolutely eat them up. I wish I were able to replay all the conversations those little guys have included me in this weekend. I know Sam, AKA Uncle Sam, has played hide and seek until I don't know if he knows he's been found yet.
Such total randomness, and honesty out of the blue. One just walks up, looks you in the face, with no hint of what's about to be said and says it.
To Bailey, "You're pretty." (turns around and walks off)No smile, no nothing. It just had to be said.
To Dicky, "You're smart."
To Mike, "You're big."
To "that other lady, I'm not allowed to mention", known as GiGi to the boys," GiGi, are you old?"
To the room full of Chicken and Dumplin cooks that I will tell you about in a minute, " Yall are so funny. Erbody in here is funny."
To me...I'm trying to make them call me Swannie, "You're Aunt Roxanna." (Aside from a girl Bailey went to school with, I do not know a Roxanna.)
OK...I guess you had to be there, but they are just adorable. As is little Logan.
*****
How many goofballs does it take to make a pot of chicken and dumplins? Well, last night it took about 10. And a triple team of MerryMaids to clean up the mess afterwards. I have a video. It's only a small portion of the event. And I've been threatened, by "you know who", (you know, that person that birthed me, that has forbidden me from mentioning her in my blogs ever again, all because I've told a few tales that she thought maybe shouldn't have been shared?)(The one that's name starts with a M and ends with an R,and she's married to my Daddy?)( Yeah, that one). I've been threatened by her to NOT post the video on Facebook. So I'm in a unique position in that, this is NOT Facebook, this is my personal blog. Yes, I do usually post a link on FB when I publish a post, but I never post the actual blog info on FB.
So I'm having a hard time deciding how much heck there will be to pay if I post the video here. In MY OWN blog, that does NOT have her name mentioned anywhere in it.
And actually...now that I think about it, she has never said I couldn't put her picture here. A video is just a moving picture, right?
I'll just keep writing, and when I get ready to publish, I guess I'll decide then, if I want to include it or not.
******
I don't know about yall, but I'm ready for Spring. We are planning a Canton trip soon, and I know Dicky and Daddy are ready to start cooking again. I think that "other lady" is, too. She usually cooks in the bean contest and any other jackpots that might be open at the cookoff. Sometimes it's dessert, or maybe bloody marys. But I think my favorite is the Salsa contest. I participate in that sometimes, too. Moth....ummm, I mean "that lady" and I have even won a time or two. She actually wins her contests a lot. They aren't too picky about your actual definition of Salsa, so there are lots of recipes and options available.
Melinda has gone to a few cook offs with us, but I dont' think she was ever there when we did our Salsa. She was REALLY impress when "that lady" won first and I won second at Novice, Texas.
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| In case you can't read it... Melinda comments, " I never knew you could dance so well.... OOOOOHHHHLAAAA LLLLAAAA!" |
I thought she was teasing...she wasn't. LOL She really thought we had won with some sort of Salsa dance.
Well, I'm pooped. It's been a long week, and I think I'll go be worthless for the rest of the day. (because I've been so productive the rest of it.)
Until next time...go do something crafty cool!!
Toodles...love, Aunt Roxanna.
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