Dude. That's just wrong...

Just because I was thinking about it, decided to do a small non-camper related blog. 

So here are a couple of things that are just wrong...

I love getting pedicures. I love the feel of my chronically crusty heels all smooth and soft. I love the pretty fresh polish on my toes, because I can never get them so smooth and nice looking. I love the hot wax on my legs and feet, so soothing. 

What I don't love? The sweet, smiling oriental girls/guys making small talk across the salon, in their native tongue. 

OK, now before you attack me for dissing these girls for not speaking English, I do realize that some do not know English. I understand that. I am ok with that. And I do think it's cool the way they can talk to each other across a large room with very quiet, little "...ting", "cha-ta...", "...nih..." noises that they can both hear and understand, in spite of the room full of people between them. 

But when this sweet, smiling, cute little girl is sitting, working on my feet with the cheese grater that she's already had to empty twice on the first toe and "ching, ta, crusti, he he heels, ya ya, ooo, ooo, yuk ee woo...he he he", to her co-worker across the room, I start feeling a little self-conscience. 

I think there should be a translation chart on back of the pedi menu card. Or a set of earphones that connects to an auto translator. I know that there is no way they are not talking about the condition of my feet. I mean, come on...they are MY feet. I know they are crusty. Why do you think I'm here. 

That's just wrong. 

YEP...wrong.

Something else that's just wrong...

Mother, Bailey and I had a booth at Trade Days today. We didn't have a ton of customers, but we had a good time. The weather was nice, A little sunny at times, a little cloudy at times, but really very nice. We were on the "good" side of the street, so we got just enough sun to keep us warm. Again...a really nice day. 

Like the good little rule followers we are, we waited until after 5:00 to shut down. That's the rules. So that's what we did. Mother and I were tired and wanted to head on home, but Bailey and Brant were going to stay for the parade. By the time we got though packing up, it was almost time for it, so we decided to stay, too. 

It was a lighted parade, so it was right at dark when it started. The fire engine blares the sirens to signal the start of the procession, so I'm ready! I was surprised, and even mentioned it to someone that was sitting beside me, that while the floats had lights on them, they were not lit up very well. You couldn't see anyone on them very well, or tell how they were dressed, or who they were. 

Over all, a good parade. Lots of entries, lots of people there to watch. 

So it's over, and I finally get to back out of my parking place and head home, I remember that I'm supposed to go by and check a friend's mail for them. I'm driving around thinking...dang, I really don't see so well at night anymore. Maybe it's just because I was downtown in the sun all day. Almost missed friends' house. It was so dark, and their porch light wasn't on. But I found it, nonetheless, and headed home. 

I walked in the house and set my stuff down. Went to the bathroom to check myself out in the mirror. You know, to see how wild my hair was, how good or bad it looked while I was out in public donning it all day. Did I look like a goof all day, or was I still feeling ok with morning primping efforts? (Yeah...smirk if you want, but you know you do it, too.)(Pants on fire if you say you don't!)

Anyway, I'm walking in and look into the mirror..................

 Really???? You don't have a problem joking and teasing about anything else. You didn't mind telling me I didn't need to be dancing to the Christmas music earlier in the day. You didn't mind telling me I did NOT need to be singing along as loudly as I had been. You didn't mind making me take my naked-Southern-Bell-between-the-toe-cigarette-holder ashtray off the table of sale items.

But to question me about why I might feel the need to wear sunglasses at 8:00 in the evening didn't cross your mind?  No one bothered. No one. Although they did tell me the asked each other why the other thought I was still wearing them. They discussed it, more than once, looking at me dancing and waving to Santa on the firetruck, but didn't think they might want to mention it to me. 

ON SO MANY LEVELS...that's just wrong! 

OK, maybe not wrong, but definitely awkward. 

I'm sure there will be more on this topic later...but right now, these are some of my top wrongs...today. 

Firmly Planted!!

WELL, well, well....I've made several attempts at updating my blog recently...only to save it to be published later. So I just kept adding. But now...I have a REAL update!! And...since I don't have a lot of time, I think I'll just leave all this rambling and let the suspense build. And I don't have dates...but this was all around mid Sept though now. 

Also, there is a not so nice picture further down the update, but I thought it was funny, so I'm leaving it. Just wanted to give a heads up in case you have little eyes looking on, and to offer apologies in advance. (But I still think it's funny...)

**************************

I had a tooth pulled recently. For me to admit that publicly, to me, is like saying I'm nasty and let my tooth rot. But I promise I keep a tidy set of teeth! I'm going to blame it on eating too much ice, and biting all those things that Momma used to say, "Stop that! You are going to ruin your teeth!"

So since I'm being so honest and open about my dental woes....I stabbed my hole with a toothpick. 

Yeah, I know that's gross. But...I had to make sure it wasn't macaroni or a sesame seed. The last thing I need is a piece of macaroni getting closed up in my gums, or worse yet, a sesame tree rooting itself in my old rootbed. (Have you ever wondered what sesame grows on? Tree, plant, root? Hummm...I'm going with worst case scenario here. ) 

And my reason for telling it here? Dicky never listens to me. So if I'm found unconscious  in a few months with a tree hanging out of my mouth, I want someone to know why. 

You would not believe the trouble I just had spelling unconscious! Sometimes I forget the goofiest things. The other day at lunch, it took me three tries to put my car in reverse. I had to put it in park and start over. REALLY glad Dicky wasn't with me for that one. Yesterday I completely, honestly, forgot what time we get off work. Rather than asking, I decided I'd just keep working until everyone started leaving. (It's 4:00, by the way.) 

I'm really feeling a large rant coming on. And since it's rained so much, which it makes it hard to get to Hag Wagon, I think I'll do a little venting...

Pet Peeves...

1. (Going withe the tooth theme on this one) When the toothpaste tube is getting low, I take the time to squeeze it all up to the top, to make it easier to squirt out on my brush, and Dicky comes along and uses up my easy squeezes.

2. People who like to tell you how WRONG you are at the last minute of a project, but never offer, in the weeks and months before, any assistance, or any of their expert advice. "Thanks Honey, but you might want to take your expert opinion and go back where you came from, because it and you about to be buried in the hole with the missing time capsules." (If you think this applies to you...believe me it probably does...but it wasn't JUST you. We've had lots of last minute advice.) (And please don't call or message me, because I'll just smile and say, "OH NO...that wasn't you!")

OH...I do have a little glampering to share. I got my chandelier put up. It's really beautiful, three tiered. There has to be thousands of crystal (mind's blank, for the right word) hangy things. The light just sparkles all over the camper so beautifully...wait, prisms, that's the word. I wanted to wait until it was all put together, but what the heck...I'll just show you...
OK...I'll apologize again for the not so G rated picture. But you gotta admit that's funny.

Ok...Dicky, of all people, made me remove it.
"Shellee Denise!!...I can't believe you put that on there!"

3. Sweat....That's probably enough said. But of course I can't stop there. I can no longer venture to the country, or anywhere they raise cattle. Not because I might be mistaken for a cow...cause I am a little large and heifer like (I don't need reassurance on this fact, thank you!), but because I may be trampled by said cows thinking I am a new fangled salt lick. Moo!

I never knew a body could produce so much sweat! I don't THINK I smell...but I certainly drip. Is this hormones? Or am I just leaking that much awesome?

Know how I know this picture is fake?
Her hair is still perfectly coiffed. And I see no "glistening of the skin".
 I can show them real sweat. 

I'll think of more peeves later, but for now, I think I'll share some pics of Halle...my sweetest of sweethearts! 

Dreaming of tea parties in the Hag Wagon.

**********************************************
Just a few projects I've completed recently...

For our backyard haven, when Haggy gets back there. 

Bracelet buddy "Hootiecal" ... Yes I'm selling these! YOU NEED ONE!

Scavenged desk 

**********************************************

November 10,2014

Well...I didn't get the above blog posted, so I'll just add to it. A VERY important update...

REAL progress!!! Painted (thought I need to add my details) Hag Wagon is planted in the yard!! Thanks to my honey baby and Ronnie for the awesome paint job! Now I can quit my bit*hin' and get the rest of my part done!!

I should have a great update this weekend, so stay tuned!!!

Is your Momma a Landmark?

This isn't a flamboyance...
it's just one! 

These things I know...

1. Flamingos and polkadots are the bomb diggity in my humble opinion. (I do have a flamingo project in the planning stages.)

2. My house is a mess and I don't give a flippity floppity flooo. 

3. My sweet grandbaby loves me best. I know THIS because she smiled at me!! 

4. The Hag Wagon has electricity.

5. Dicky is the best cook in the entire USA...(will you fix dinner, Babe?) {you know what they say about flattery} 

6..... Whoa!!!! Wait...What????? Brakes........errrrrkkkkkkk!!!!! .#4 again. Yep...I am electricized!! 

I ACTUALLY HAVE AN UPDATE!! 

My old friend Joe got electricity in the ole Haggy Waggy! I haven't see her to try it out yet, but Dicky says it works. 

Now I can get on with the nagging, and move to the topic of exterior paint! Then we can get her planted in her permanent sitting spot. She did get moved to the front yard...goes along with our white trash theme we seem to have going on right now. Hopefully we will have that all remedied soon. 

Anyways...if all goes as planned, we will soon be ready for Open Wagon party. (Open Wagon, as in Open HOUSE...not Open BAR! Although if I happen to have a bottle of tipsy or two, I'm more than happy to share!) 

Yall stick with your Jose, or Patron, or
whoever in between.
Republic tequila is the best.

Speaking of tipsy. No, I'm not tipsy now. But I had the super duperist pineapple lime margarita a couple of weekends ago. Thanks Harvey, and I have a new tequila.  If you haven't tried it, give it a taste. Just a taste, though. I am not going to be accused of contributing to a "only to be regretted later, but a pretty darn good time now" event. :) Not that I've ever known about that! 

Had a good time visiting with Harvey, Jean, all their kids and friends at Red River week before last. And of course ole Short Neck himself, Taylor Fox and his sweet wife Jocelyn. We can't wait until next year. The weather was perfect, but the company was best! Hey, Tay...This one time, I had a cockatoo...

Last weekend was another cookoff, here in Post, this time. Steven, Becky and Billy came from Colorado, and Billy became the apprentice to Smokin Dick. I hope he learned lots of BBQing tips...I'm afraid of what else Dicky might have told him. 

And this weekend...no wonder I've been so far behind on everything...we had the Odom family reunion. Sweet little Hagatha thought she had a reunion of her own.... 

"Momma...is that you? "

It wasn't her momma, but she did enjoy the shade for a couple of days. And we enjoyed Dale and Deb's company.

Now, I'm hoping for a little...no a lot...of catch up time. I did catch up on my blocks, finally...I was over 52 orders behind! One of the million reasons my little wagon has been neglected. But I'm back to square one. Need to get my craft room reorganized, and finish up on some projects for the glamper.

A few orders ready for the post office...anyone have a forklift? 

Dicky is getting our new fence up, with my help. Or at least my offer of help. He hasn't actually taken me up on it yet, but I'm ready and raring as soon as he says "jump"! I won't actually jump, though. That usually results in my tripping and knocking something off a table or ruining my new sandals, or falling on a dog, or on my rear, or tripping over the vacuum cleaner cord, since it has been sitting ready for action for a week now. 

Anyone notice how I'm NOT talking about my grandbaby?(Well, except for the small comment at the top.) I'm trying to not be one of those obnoxious grandmothers. You know...the ones that put a million pictures a day on Facebook, and the ones that make everyone look at her, but jump in front of anyone that tries, in case she might do or say something and I'll miss it. I'll never be one of those. :)

Well, this was a short installment, but I had to update, since Hag is electrOfied. Let's just hope when I actually plug her in, she doesn't elctroFRY! 

Toodles for now! Go do something crafty!! 

Ok...just one. Please block the double chin out of your memory...we were taking a selfie. 

What the hell...it's my blog... :) One more! 

It's all so very UNprocrastinational of me!

Yeah, It's been awhile. It's been a crazy couple of months, weeks, days, or however long it's been since I've blogged. 

As usual, not camper progress. But I DID get my flowerbeds cleaned out and bought my first couple of plants. I know, I know...it's a little late to be planting. But somethings are better late than never. 

I'm so far behind in making name blocks, I don't know if I will ever catch up...so I have spent most of my free time, sewing and making other things that take my mind off of how behind I am. That's better than procrastinating, right? I NEVER procrastinate. I'm telling you when it just HAS to be done, I can jump up and panic with the best of them! 

And man am I feeling mighty accomplished these days! 

So what did I do, you ask? Well, if you have fb, which I'm sure most of you do, you have probably already seen most. Unless you have my posts blocked from showing up on your notifications so you won't have to see my cruddy crafts, game requests and rambling nonsensical status updates, in which case, you probably aren't reading this now, because this is just a long drawn out version of all of that, minus the game requests. (Actually, since I have your attention, I could use some Candy Crush lives, Bubble Witch bubbles, and some Goldfish slots coins, if you don't mind.)

I got Halle's bedding done...

Made this little sign for my yard....

And a trillion of these little towels...(prettiest little model ever!)

OMG!! I forgot I promised Harper Jade one for Water Rampage tomorrow. Better hurry  and get to my machine before bed. 

DEBBIE DOWNER ALERT!! (scroll on down to skip the sap)

I have an experience I like to share.Something (actually someone) that happened to me when I first started my cancer treatment. And sadly I have an update...

Almost 3 months, multiple hospital trips and surgeries, and my eventual diagnosis, I was in Lakeside Hospital, oncology floor, receiving my first round of chemo. I have to say however sick I was, I was feeling very, very loved by all my friends and family. Soooo blessed. But also very spent. 

Thursday, after finally starting treatments that would become routine for a few months, I was exhausted. So the nurses put a sign on my door asking visitors to just leave a note to let me know they had been there, so I would rest. 

Early in the evening, despite the note, my door flies open, and I look up thinking it was the nurse. It wasn't. This sweet, almost bald (naturally bald, not from chemo)ball of fire bursts in. 

Jay Green (for you Postites, not the Jay Green we went to school with)is a man in his early/mid 50s. He had at the time a beard/goatee thing. Nice starched shirt. Huge smile on his face, and I don't remember the color of his eyes, but boy were they full of something bursting to get out. 

He introduced himself and apologized for ignoring the sign, but said he was just in the hall and God told him he needed to come in my room. 

We started visiting and I learn that he was diagnosed with liver cancer two years before. He had a tumor the size of a mall cantaloupe. Doctors told him it was inoperable and he wasn't eligible for a transplant. 

He replayed his conversation with the doctor the day he received his news. 

"Well, Doctor. How long do you think I have?"

The doctor told him, "Only God really knows how long any of us have."

"Yes, I believe that too, Doc. But lets take God out of the picture for just a minute and you tell me what YOU think."

He was told that day that he had four months at best. Being the "ball of fire" I mentioned earlier (and I mean fire as in, on fire for the Lord and on fire for living)he told the doctor, "Doc...you are about to see a miracle."

No need to scroll back up to re-read. I did say TWO years prior was when he received this diagnosis. (Oh my goodness...have I mentioned lately how good our God is?)

He went through treatments and procedures, and said that the doctor told him recently (then recently, not now recently) that if they could shrink the tumor to smaller than a quarter they could go ahead with a transplant! 

We visited for over an hour. He asked about us (Dicky was with me, of course) and my situation. We cried some, laughed a LOT, and it was like we had known him forever. 

He told us about taking his mother to the fair shortly before she died, way up in years. They rode the tilt-a-whirl I think. He said it made the paper. 

He told us about a prank he pulled on her when she was in the hospital, close to her last days, dressing up as a foreign doctor and telling her all kinds of silly things, before she realized who he was. I would repeat the story here, but I know I could never tell it like he did. 

As the months went on after his diagnosis, he said he just kept setting goals for himself, deals with God, if you will. 

"Ok God, just let me make it to Christmas and I'll be ready." "Let me see my first grandchild." To each birthday, holiday, event, etc. 

Obviously God favored him enough to let him stay as long as he needed to spread his story and His blessings. He certainly blessed me that night. I can't begin to tell you the lift my spirit experienced while he was there, and even after he left the room. 

A few months went on, and I found myself back in the hospital with pneumonia. As it happened, he decided to make a trip up to the lifesaving fifth floor and was chatting with the nurses. They told him I was there, so he again bounds into my room and gets to meet my parents this time, and my sweet friends, the Hogues. 

OMGoodness, we talked and laughed for over 3 hours. His condition seemed to be getting better, as he said the tumor was shrinking and was almost at the operable size. Amazing, huh? HE IS sooo good!! 

 We talked about a book I had read, and I told him when I got out and was able, I would buy him a copy and take it to him. 

That's just what I did a few months later. Went in to the store he managed (Lazyboy furniture in Lubbock)to see how he was and give him the book. He told us that he reached his latest milestone by going skydiving with his son, and had pictures to go along with the story. 

I've intended to go back and see him, just to stay in touch with someone that helped to remind me to see the good in all situations, to keep your sense if humor, and to never lose faith. 

I'm sad to say that was likely the last time I will see my friend. I stopped by the store last week and the salesman told me that Jay is retired and home on Hospice. 

I don't intend to try to contact him. I told him how much he and his visit meant to me everytime I saw him. 

Well, ok, I lied...I tried to look him up on Facebook, and didn't find him. But I did find this, if you want to hear more about him. 

http://lubbockonline.com/faith/2012-04-07/youre-sitting-next-miracle-proximity-death-jay-green-found-ministry-life#.U8xUhPldWAU 

'You're sitting next to a miracle' - In the proximity of death, Jay Green found a ministry of life | Lubbock Online | Lubbock Avalanche-Journal

Moral of this story...be a blessing to someone. Don't wait for tragedy to tell someone what they mean to you. Don't take life so seriously. And NEVER lose faith.  

SAP alert over...

Want to know what really stinks? 

               

Now, when you are finished reading I want you to go back and count all the "W"s (incase you can't type and didn't know what letter this is supposed to be) and see how hard I had to work to get this blog written. And the ewww between the z and x is not really as nasty as it looks. It's actually dried Modpodge that fell off my finger while I was printing shipping labels, which made me start thinking about how many I still have left after I mail these few, which lead to me writing this, to keep from thinking about that anymore. 

Next time I write I will be a grandma! Halle should be here in a week or so and I almost can't contain my excitement! I'm just warning you now, there will be pictures...lots and lots of pictures. And I am apologizing in advance that MY grandbaby will be so much cuter and smarter and more well behaved than any of yours! I just don't want your feelings hurt. Yours are all pretty cute, and smart and all that...but mine's gonna be the queen of cuteness!!

So I look up and even my flying pick is smiling with anticipation. We are so ready to meet our Halle Bob, Halle Looya, Halle Bug, Halle Blair. 

I think I've rambled enough for now. Gonna head to bed and rest up for all I'm going to think about accomplishing tomorrow.

Toolde-ooo...Go do something creative!!

Vaca in the Rockies!

I'll go ahead and get it out of the way. I have no camper progress to report. I'm sure you assumed that already since I haven't blogged in a while. But we have had some good things going on to tell you about. 

I started a writing a couple of times. Now I'll have to either delete and start over, or leave it and hope I don't lose you in the timeline....how bout the latter?

    (Insert date here)

 

(I can't remember what day Mother's Day fell on, but that's the date to insert)(Today is going to be kind of a 'do it yourself, cause I'm on vacation' kind of a blog.)

Happy Mother's Day all you Muthas! I didn't get to see my babies, but I talked to both. I got to see my momma! And had a nice relaxing day doing pretty much nothing.
 

Dicky put up my awesome kitchen junkin lights. Annnddddd......drumroll, please......put the new tire ON my camper!!

Also, I have to add to my last post...(Again, do it yourself date insert, since u don't remember the date of my last blog, either)We spent some time with our kids in Lubbock on last Saturday (not yesterday, but LAST week)(not actually LAST week. Refer to previous parenthesied notes). We(we, as in, Dicky, I, Bailey, Brant, AND Chase and Bekah...the whole Odom herd) went to JoAnn's to look at patterns and fabric for sweet baby Halle's baby bedding. My neglect in mentioning that part of our weekend may have had something to do with the fact that, as we sat down at the pattern book table, Dicky and Chase proceeded to try to order queso and beer. Loudly. Then Dicky started taking selfies of our whole group.

Have I mentioned that they have no polite "indoor" voices? I did teach my kids better, but let's blame Dicky's loudness on HIS momma, since she can't defend herself here! (Love you, Ree!) 

We tried to ignore them, and finally got them to move down the block to Caprock Cafe, but...Dicky soon came back. As we are standing at the fabric counter, Dicky begins, or rather attempts, to entertain the obviously unentertainable hagatha that was cutting our fabric. I tried to send him to check out the stock of dingleberries for my camper curtains. WRONG thing to do...rather wrong item to send him for. But that is what they are...right?

Anyhoo, we found the cutest fabric for the baby. And I bought my own dingleberries for my curtains, and the little western pillow you probably saw on Facebook. 

    (Insert date here)(let's just call it fast forward to a week or so later)

 

The next door house is finally moved!

It was pretty exciting, and a little sad, watching the house you've looked at for the last 30 years roll off on its own. Probably how some parents feel when their grown children finally leave the nest. Bittersweet. Maybe a little more sweet, than bitter, depending on how long the nest was full. :) 

Dicky's started on the clean up. And will be working on a new fence soon. 

I just love a man with a jackhammer! :)

       (Insert date)(I'm on vacation! I don't have to know the date until tomorrow...geez!)

 

I guess I'll break the bad news. We are moving to Colorado.  

Yep, folks. If that's all it takes to get some rain in West Texas, we are loading up the Hag Wagon and heading to the hills! It even rained on in CO, but it evidently drains off pretty fast in the mountains. I looked out my window yesterday morning and look what I saw! 

The lost ark floated up and dry docked beside our hotel.  

Didn't see much wildlife though. Well, not the kind you might think would come off an ark. However, if you haven't heard, wacky tobaccy is legal in Colorado now.

We didn't see any very obvious signs of that law in Greeley, where we were visiting on the first part of our trip. And by obvious, I mean, no "Weed for Sale" signs in windows, etc., that I noticed. But Donna, Jana, Teresa and I were just moseying around inside TJ Max. I'm admiring all the pretty dishes and such, when there, sitting on the shelf beside chip and dip plates...

I used to think TJ Max was the "bomb"...now I'm gonna call em the "bong". 

Our trip to Colo has been a blast. We went to see Miss Megan graduate, and got to do lots of visiting. You know any time Dicky gets to singing he's REALLY having a good time. The best was Steven leading us all in his back porch rendition of (I'm apologizing in advance for putting this song in your head...)"YOU DONT HAVE TO CALL ME DARLIN...DARLIN..."

 

All the neighbors lights came on, and I think the dogs are all still howling, but I really do think we sounded pretty good! 

There were some more serious moments as the discussion turned to the travesty of it being legal to own an ak47 assault rifle (or is an Ak47 a jet?) but only being allowed to hunt a duck with three shotgun shells. Sometimes I think smoking laughing grass is a prerequisite to being in a governmental, law making capacity. 

Shopping, pedis, bbq, visiting, movies, singing... we really hated to leave, but had a really good time. Bill, Connie, Greg, Kerri, Donna, Ernie, Steven, Becky, Jared, Katelin, Andrew, Scott, Megan, Billy...it was soo good to see y'all! And Teresa, John, Johnny, Jana and Jason, happy to call you all newly adopted family! (I hope I didn't miss anyone! 

So we left Greeley headed to Estes Park, and found ourselves spending most of the day in Fort Collins junk shopping. 

 

Let me just interrupt this intoxicating recap of our vaca with a observation I noticed though our trip, but my husband may not have...

This cup is me...yes I am very much a "Cup of Joy". And at times, can be pretty hot. So use caution. I won't specify what kind of hot...but I AM often hot. This message was flashed at us several times in various places. I don't know if Dicky already knew it, or just missed the signs altogether. 

Did you see this one, Babe?

OK...Back to the story...Estes Park is really pretty and we were excited to go there but after getting started Junkin, we just couldn't stop!!

In our happy place! 

We did find a lot of neat goodies! But my fav...or rather favs...my Raggedy Ann dolls. At $2 and $3 each, how could I resist?? Then, the last place we stopped had a whole RA section! I had to hurry to make my selections there before I was caught. (I only came home with five!)

Our dogs finally started barking pretty loudly, so we headed on out to Estes. 

No, silly. I didn't take my dogs. None of them. And believe or not, no one has called yet to report any of them as escapees. We are ready to see them, though! 

(Whew... This has become quite a long blong....oops, blog. See, it's not just my dogs barkin...I'm tired! )

So we got to Estes Park. I really wanted to go through the Stanley Hotel.

If you aren't familiar with the Stanley, it's where "The Shining" was filmed and is supposed to be haunted. I wanted to stay there but Chicken Dick said NO. So then I thought we could  at least go tour it. He ho hummed around about it all day, very non committal. 

After we had dinner and most of the shops were closing I mentioned maybe we could do a night tour. 

 

Scaredy chicken tittie baby. We didn't go. REDRUM REDRUM

Next morning, up and attem. Off to Blackhawk via the Peak to Peak hiway, byway, bypass, something another. Very pretty drive. There were a few little towns between there and there, so we just took our time and explored a little.  

Real eye candy for any legit junker can be found in Ward, Colo. OMG the junk they were sitting on! EVERY home had some sort of make-shift lean-to built-on made out of every type of collector's metal known to man. Old signs, antique furniture, trucks, doors, windows, and so on, and so on. 

We tooted on into "town" (I use the term "town" VERY loosely). One road in, same road out. We stopped and went into THE store. Let's just say there were eyes following us out of every picture and deer mount on the wall. A lot like you would think Hotel California would be, only with long haired, bearded hemp-, Maui Wowie-, puff the magic dragon-growing looking folks peeping out all the peepholes at us. I wasn't scared. Dicky, however, was concerned we might never be seen again if we ventured any further. 

So on to Nederland we went. Very cute little town. HOWEVER...I believe this was Ward's outlet for the fruits of their labors, if you know what I mean. Remember how I mentioned we saw no sign of weed being sold in Greeley? For all you doobie lovin brethren, Nederland would be the place to go. No, we didn't buy, or partake, nor did we even go in anywhere it was being sold, but it was really odd seeing cannibis retail signs up everywhere. Kinda groovy dude!

Hurrying my loooonnnnnggggg story on, we finally made it to Blackhawk. Love it! Cute little mining town transformed into casinos. Dicky won over $700...coming home with $600. I...well, did I mention I found some raggedy ann dolls in Fort Collins? 

      (Insert TODAY's date)

 

So we are almost home. In Amarillo, actually. We have a nice time in some beautiful country. But I'm really glad to finally be back in the land of the Toot n Totum.

When the MaryJane toking genius that named the popular Colorado convenience stores comes out of his smokey fog, he's not gonna be happy to realize how ugly the "Kum and Go" sounds! I'm really appalled! Ewww!

Hey, Dicky!!!

I still don't think he got it! You would have thought the 60 degree AC would have done it.

And no, we aren't really moving to Colorado...although I would love to. It's so beautiful, and such nice people. They could give we friendly West Texans a run for their money!

"...you never even call me by my naaammmeee!" (Didn't want you to quit singing so soon!) 

TIREd...I'm just TIREd. :)

Do you know what this is? Yeah, a tire. A flippin tire. I'm supposed to be impressed with the progress on Glampy-Poo when this is ALL there is to show. According to my darling hussy, my update should have started out....Hey look yall!! I got a tire!! 

No, it's not on the camper, but by golly its on the wheel. That's something, now isn't it? Psssshhhhh....whatev, you man-hag. (I'm just a tad irritated with my lack of assistance from my man. Can you tell?) I'm so disgusted, I wasn't even going to blog this week, but I'm trying to get over it. 

Ok...so forever the optimist...lots of good things did happen this week! 

First, coolest story. (the story might not be as cool as the actual experience, but I'm gonna tell you anyway.) The next door house moving is going kind of slow lately. But the moving dude has done enough that the fence has had to be partially removed, thus making our captive dogs more like free spirits! I know in my heart that Saucy (young Golden Retriever) would be very much a free spirited hippy if she were human. Sam (OLD Lhasa Apso), on the other hand, 

Only with a little more hair. 

So my optimistic (I'm trying to convince myself) self gets a knock on the door Friday morning...early. 

The lady at the door, "Yes, excuse me, but I am an abnormally early riser and I just happened to be roaming blocks and blocks away from my home, and passing yours. On foot. I just saw these two dogs and thought to myself, 'Self, Shellee has only one or two dogs, so what are the chances these two could be hers?'" 

(I'm standing peeking around the 1/4inch opening in the door trying to hold the closest blanket I could find around my teensy tiny gowned body.)(My gown wasn't teensy tiny, I was trying to allude to the fact that my body was teensy tiny.)(Yes, I know my body is not really teensy tiny, but I'm still feeling a little sarcastic due to the fact that I only have a tire to show for two weeks of potential working time.)(Like anyone would be able to see past my morning hair to notice my teensy tiny body, OR gown.)

She continues, "So I decided to knock VERY loudly, as to wake up not only you, but any other dogs that might be sleeping inside, as well as your mother-in-law across the street, your parents on 13th Street, and all the inmates at Dalby, and ask if they were your dogs." 

Ok...I'm being silly, I really did appreciate her telling me my dogs were out...WHO let the dogs out? Whho, whoo whoo.(Yeah, I had to go there.)

So anyway...making a short story long...I threw on some clothes, after attempting to peek off my porch and yell for the two mongrels a few times, and finally found them across the street over by my office. 

Ugggghhhh...you know what? This is really a lame story, so I'm not going to bore you, after all. I'll just share the picture of the cute little mouse I met during the Great Dog Chase of Friday morning. He had such a good time with Saucy, that he stuck around all day so I could save him from being run over, time and time again. 

I named him Squints. Original, huh?

I think he was still stoned from the night before. Little hood rat. 

 

Hey Squints...where'd you go, Buddy?? 

So, the rest of Friday goes along fairly blah, as do most of my days. Work, home, dinner, bed, Netflix. I watched an extra episode of my current series obsession, since tomorrow was to be Saturday, and I could sleep late. 

So I'm in the middle of a really good dream, that I don't remember, because I never remember my dreams, but I know I was in the middle of one, because I was asleep, until I was woken by a loud, booming, KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK. 

Seriously???? Yes, seriously. Early Waking Walking Woman has a husband. Yes, he lives blocks away with his wife. Yes, he knocks every bit as loud as she. Yes, it was every bit as early, maybe earlier. Yes, I was every bit as teeny tiny and lovely morning haired, but didn't bother to grab a blanket this time. You get what you deserve, people. Wake me up once, shame on you. Wake me up twice...it's your own d*mn problem getting the sight out of your head. 

"Um yes, I'm sorry to bother you, but I was just up at Stripes, and there was a dog up there. My wife said you had dogs that got out yesterday, so I thought I'd check to make sure it wasn't yours." 

REALLY???? You are up at the buttcrack of dawn, (yes, I said buttcrack) on foot, at Stripes, on a Saturday, (at the buttcrack of dawn did I mention) and see a dog and randomly think...'Oh, this must be Shellee's dog, because she has dogs."

It wasn't my dog. So smiled politely, thanked Mr. Buttcrack of Dawn Waker-upper, closed the door and at looked at him through the back of the door like...

...went back to bed for a bit, got up, cleaned house, and went to spend the day in Lubbock, NOT working on my camper. 

BUT....the optimistic icing on the cake for the weekend! Did a little junk shopping with my mom and dad, and man-hag (I'm still irritated.). Went to the Goodwill Pound store. LOVE IT! It's like the grab bag of thrift stores! 

I was just a digging up a storm and broke my nail wayyyy down in the quick. Yeah, ouch. But that didn't stop me. I held that sucka up above my head to slow the bleeding and continued to dig one handed! I found what may be my best find ever!!! 

Yes! It's a soccer ball trophy! And it's heavy! Not a cheap plastic thing. It's make of real wood and some kind of glass, with gold leaf on it. I think it's like fine china or something really expensive. The gold leaf is flaking off, but that's ok, because I have a really fantabulously awsome plan for this pretty!! I'll try  get it done soon, so I don't keep you waiting too long. It's gonna be a surprise. If anyone needs a brass plate that says "First Place Baptist Church 2009", let me know. I won't be using that part of it. I might even part with it for free. 

I found some other goodies, too. There's a cute little "naked-woman-in-a-bathtub" ashtray that I picked up at another thrift store. It sounds bad, but it's actually very tasteful, as far as "naked-woman-in-a-bathtub" ashtrays go. She holds cigarettes between her toes. I'm sure a lot of time and thought went into the design. I'm not posting a pic of it, since some may be offended, but I've listed it on my Etsy shop if you are interested in purchasing it. Or just send me a message and I might make you a deal! But I have to say, first come first served. I only have one, and I can't play favorites. 

Dicky asked what I wanted for Mother's Day...bwwwwahhahhahhahhaaaa ...opened yourself up for that one didn't ya babe! 

I want ELECTRICITY!!! I WANT LIGHTS IN MY CAMPER AND IN MY KITCHEN! I WANT, I WANT, I WANT!! 

Well...This was, once again, a lame boring, no progress Glamper update. But on the bright side...it IS an update! Maybe it's a little spark underneath the buttocks of my darling cupcake to get his rear in gear! 

Ok...well until next we meet...get crafty and make something! Toodle-loo!!